Jeffrey LewisNorth Korea Just Enjoys Nuclear Talks

It kills me that The Onion has a better grasp on nuclear dipomacy with North Korea than just about anyone else.

Report: North Korea Just Enjoys Nuclear Talks

November 16, 2005 | Issue 41•46

WASHINGTON, DC—The Bulletin Of The Atomic Scientists published a report Tuesday revealing what the international community has long suspected: The government of North Korea simply enjoys nuclear talks. “After years of protracted talks about strategic versus domestic nuclear programs and launch and delivery tactics, it’s become increasingly evident that North Korea’s stalling tactics stem from a deep desire to chat about nukes,” said Ambassador Linton Brooks, chief of the National Nuclear Security Administration. “We are beginning to think that behind all this nuclear brinksmanship are 12 high-level scientists and politicians who enjoy getting together, kicking back, and making a weekend out of it.” Although North Korea Prime Minister Pak Pong Ju had no comment on the report, members of his cabinet said they “would be delighted” to get together and discuss the matter further.

Our dear Bulletin has selected some highlights of the real stuff on its webpage under the title North Korea: Nuclear number nine?.